This post goes out to anyone who has ever used OkCupid (or OkStupid to those who are punny). Take notice folks, income inequality is expanding like peeps in a microwave and the dating game is changing. So, why not check out a free dating website? I’ll tell you why not as well as why I capitulated.
Unless the website is for those in a difficult predicament (e.g. single parent, divorced and over 40, etc.) where it’s more appropriate for you to disclose facts about your life and what you require in a partner, I believe that, for the most part, dating sites are a contemptuous platform to meet others and a hindrance to how we socialize in society. Who wouldn’t prefer an enamoring romance story of how a couple met over “I swiped right and we took it from there”?
- It makes men lazy and asocial
- Encourages women to have unreasonable standards (aka requirements)
Now before you stop reading and call me a naïve bigot, I do understand that there are benefits and that it doesn’t have this affect on everyone. Just hear me out, okay?
To my first point, I’ve seen men on OkCupid, Tinder, etc. while at a bar surrounded by women. I get it, I really do. It sucks more to be rejected in person vs being rejected online but there’s more guts and glory associated with the old fashioned, “Hello” to the pretty lady sitting next to you at the cafe.
To my second point, this is both a good and bad thing. It gives women more options than ever because most women on dating sites have their inboxes flooded with messages, although not every message comes from a sane, non-perverted man. However, having skimmed through more than 600 female profiles, I could not believe what I was reading. It’s good to be upfront with people but a lot of these so called “requirements” were fatuously nonsensical and absolutely ridiculous.
- “I’m looking for the male version of myself. If you’re not that person, GO AWAY”
- “Don’t message me if you are not a feminist”
- “Don’t waste your time if you don’t have a beard”
- “Must be able to drive stick”
- “Must be over 6 foot”
The most popular is the height requirement. But did I miss something? Are we at Disney World and you’re a world famous roller coaster? Didn’t think so. Not to say that men can’t be shallow as well but it did surprise me how many profiles were outright shallow. To me, these are equivalent to the dick picks that moronic guys send to women on the internet – a phenomenon that I don’t understand.
Further to this, when you’re in a large city and you get hundreds of messages online from men that like and desire you, as well as getting hit on in person when you go out, how could you not feel like you’re at the top of your game? I know I would. If this is a reality for you, how could you not enjoy the single life? As your insecurities start to diminish, you inherit more confidence. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t jealous. You get to pick through the weeds and have your choice at a selection of attractive flowers. You’ll have your share of bad dates but at least you’ll get date. How novel! Using dating websites to cast a bigger net seems to be more rewarding for women than men. According to Christian Rudder, the co-founder of OkCupid, women tend to be more superficial than men. Though, I don’t necessarily believe that one can derive that correlation from his statistics. Click here to be the judge.
So, with a heavy heart and much contemplation, I made two profiles on OkCupid to host my own social experiment. One profile was for myself and the other was a fake female profile. I’ll fill you in on my results in my next post.
Thanks for reading and make sure to comment if you disagree with me. Otherwise, I’m just chatting with myself. :p
-Single Guy in NYC